Life is brief

I've met many people over the internet..some I've been able to meet face to face...others I've known only online. There's a realness, and at the same time, a kind of un-realness to that. Real in the sense that you know there's a real person on the other end of the conversation...sitting before a computer screen and keyboard, typing out words which have meaning, yet without the pitch, tone, and inflection of voice or facial expressions to go with it. That's the un-real part of it I guess. You can get to know a person fairly well over the internet, but at the same time, not know them in the fullest sense. But I've found it amazing that I've actually gotten close to a few people in the realm of cyberspace. A few months ago I met a young man posting on another blog...he was living in my home town at the time, but was from Louisianna originally. He was an amusing fellow in the way he would type out his comments in his native cajun dialect, but we had a shared theological stance, so we hit it off immediately. Not long after our paths first crossed, he moved back to his home state, then showed up again on the blog where I first ran across him, then on my own discussion forum, where we began an email correspondence. We knew each other by screennames at first, then shared our real names. Jake began sharing some things with me about his life..turns out he was a preacher at one time in a small Primitive Baptist church where he lived..he had been married but his wife had died, and he had no children. After a few weeks Jake shared with me that he had been suffering severe migraines for some time and was going to the doctor to have it checked out. It was discovered that he had contracted west nile virus, but there was a more serious problem as well...he had blood clots on his brain...there were many tests and medications..during that time Jake shared some of his writings, one of which was a sermon outline. In an email one day, I asked Jake to give my email address to someone he trusted, just in case something were to happen..which he had already thought of. He was extremely ill for a couple of weeks, then he seemed to be improving. Eight days ago I got an email from him...he had had several good days in a row and was thankful, energized, and looking forward to preaching again this past Sunday for the first time in a while. On Saturday afternoon I logged into my email account to write back to him, and there was an email in my inbox from his address...but it wasn't from Jake. As I read the words of his pastor's wife, I sank in my chair...Jake had had a massive stroke on Friday evening, was unconscious, and on a breathing machine..she promised she would keep me abreast of his condition...on Sunday afternoon another email arrived...at 5:30am that morning, Jake--Shadrack Jackson Daigrepont, age 35, graduated to glory. I had only known Jake through the technology of the internet..but as I read the words I had hoped to never hear...I wept..as if I'd known him all my life.

There are times I'm not sure how healthy it is to know someone in this way. I had never met Jake face to face, but the pain I feel at his passing is undeniable. That's the realness of it...yet it feels strange to grieve for someone you never actually met...only in words typed on a page...that's the un-realness of it...life in this age is certainly different...but as it's always been...very brief.

Jake had left me a message in the letter he had given to his pastor's wife...I'll share a portion of it...."Don't go worryin' 'bout me, cause I got nothin' to be worrin' about; and dont you ever go forgettin, it's all of grace".
I'm not worried Jake...I know you're better off than I am at this moment...and I won't forget, my friend.